During Mental Health Week, from 12th to 19th May, a new study has highlighted a troubling rest crisis among UK parents, with serious implications for their mental health. Conducted by Platinum Spas, the survey of 2,000 UK adults reveals that parents are severely rest-deprived, with burnout affecting this group disproportionately.
The findings are stark. Almost two-thirds of UK parents (62%) report feeling burnt out or stressed daily, while 66% say they never get enough rest or relaxation time. On average, parents manage just 2 hours and 40 minutes of proper rest per week, excluding sleep. Alarmingly, 43% of parents with children under 18 rest for less than one hour weekly.
Dr Gracie McLaven, a clinical psychologist and founder of Brain Body Wealth, said: “Sadly, I’m not surprised by these findings. I hear this a lot in the therapy room, but that doesn’t make it any less alarming.” She added: “When two-thirds of parents admit they never feel properly rested, we have to see this as a serious public health concern. Rest is absolutely vital for our mental health, it’s during these quiet moments that our brain is able to process thoughts, regulate emotions, and consolidate memories. Without rest, our minds stay in a constant state of overload, which can lead to increased stress, irritability, and difficulty coping. Our nervous systems become dysregulated, our emotional reserves get depleted, and even small tasks can start to feel unmanageable.”
Barriers to rest are widespread. The study found that 96% of parents face obstacles to resting, often prioritising their family or partner’s wellbeing over their own. Additionally, 60% feel guilty when taking time to rest, and 51% feel judged by others for doing so. Dr McLaven explained: “In the therapy room, I often hear people express guilt around resting. For parents especially, this guilt is often tied to the pressure of being ‘the perfect parent’. There’s a deep belief that rest is indulgent or even irresponsible, that good parents should always be doing, helping, and giving. But the truth is, rest isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. When parents prioritise rest it has a positive ripple effect on those they are caring for. When parents are rested, they’re more patient, more emotionally available, and better able to meet the demands of family life. It’s not selfish to rest, it’s an act of care, for ourselves and our children.”
Performative rest undermines recovery. The rise of “performative rest” – activities like scrolling social media or binge-watching TV that fail to recharge the brain – is a significant issue. Over a third of parents (34%) struggle with this, and 65% rely on quick fixes like phone use. For instance, 50% use their phone while watching TV, 36% while on the toilet, 34% while eating, and 33% while socialising. Gen X women, aged 45 to 60, are particularly prone to multitasking during rest. Dr McLaven noted: “For parents carrying a relentless and often invisible mental load, true rest can feel out of reach. Many tend to prioritise the needs of those around them over their own wellbeing, leaving little room for rest that actually restores. Guilt plays a big role too, taking time for themselves can feel selfish, so they turn to quick, low-effort distractions like scrolling or passive screen time. These might offer a momentary sense of escape, but they rarely give the brain the space it needs to properly reset. Without intentional rest, we stay in survival mode, running on fumes.”
Burnout is a growing concern. Parents experience more negative effects from poor rest than non-parents, with 53% reporting worse mood, 42% lower motivation, 42% increased anxiety, and 40% poorer mental health and resilience. Nearly two-thirds (64%) of parents with children under 18 report burnout, compared to 55% of non-parents.
The findings underscore the urgent need for societal shifts to support parents’ mental health. Encouraging guilt-free rest and reducing stigma around self-care could help alleviate this crisis, ensuring parents are better equipped to thrive.
