Well-being, mental health and happiness are talked about daily, but what impact does sex have on these aspects of our lives? This was just one of the big questions Lovehoney set out to answer in the biggest state-of-the-nation report into sexual happiness in 2019.
The UK findings prove that sex and happiness are intrinsically linked, and that sex plays an important role in our overall happiness, but are we getting enough? What’s distracting us from having more sex? And what are we fantasising about?
Only one in five Brits are very sexually fulfilled, perhaps because two-thirds of us would like to be having sex a couple of times a week but only 39% of us manage it. And when we do manage it, a huge 7 in 10 admit to getting distracted, worrying about the noise they might be making (27%), family or friends being in the house (24%) or even being put off by pets in the bedroom (17%). And when it comes to the ‘Big O’, there’s still a significant gap, with 58% of men orgasming every time during sex, compared to only 24% of women.
On the subject of fantasies, two-thirds (66%) admit to fantasising during sex, with 1 in every 10 men and women fantasising about being with someone of a different gender to their usual sexual preference, and half of us (49%) loving the idea of adding variety with a new sex position. Also, 21% of men and 16% of women dream about having sex with more than one person, but sometimes the distraction comes from further afield, with respondents naming their top celebrity crushes, who include UK heart-throbs; Tom Hardy, Idris Elba, David Tennant and Anthony Joshua, with TV personalities Holly Willoughby, Lorraine Kelly and Monty Don joining the leader board.
Brits are also a nation of fresh air lovers, with three-quarters of us admitting to either having had sex on a beach or being prepared to try it. Even more (84%) say the same about a field or forest, with 89% saying they have had, or would love to experience, sex in a car. The Mile-High Club is less popular than some might think, with only 5% of Brits having tried it.
Masturbation and sex toy use also provided some fascinating insight, with more women taking control of their sex lives to enhance their pleasure levels, with 71% saying they use sex toys, versus 63% of men.
Commenting on the findings, Lovehoney’s sex and relationship expert Sammi Cole, said: ‘This study shows how our sex lives evolve throughout our lives, how adventurous we are prepared to be and how sexually fulfilled we feel, both physically and emotionally. The findings from this study will ultimately ensure we’re able to continue fulfilling our brand promise to customers in the future.’
The full study, researching 3,000 people across the UK, US and Australia is available for download here.
Dennis Relojo-Howell is the founder of Psychreg. He writes for the American Psychological Association and has a weekly column for Free Malaysia Today.