Non-suggestive questions can affect feelings and memories of parents, according to a recent study published in the journal Psychological Reports. This raises important considerations for therapists and individuals alike, especially in understanding how seemingly harmless discussions about parents can alter emotions and memories of childhood.
The study involved two experiments that explored how reappraisals of mothers could affect both current emotions and memories of childhood. Researchers found that participants’ feelings of happiness, sadness, anger, and interest towards their mothers could change after engaging in writing exercises designed to either enhance or diminish positive perceptions of their mothers.
Professor Lawrence Patihis, senior lecturer at the University of Portsmouth, and honorary visiting professor at the University of Buckingham, explained: “It is something many of us seem to have observed: offspring can reappraise parents in often unfair ways, and that has happened in therapy as well. But the question is, how can parents be reappraised in therapy? Do the therapist’s questions have to be very leading and biased? Well, no, they can just be as simple as asking for the client to talk about previous examples of when their parent was not generous. No suggestion is needed.”
Participants in the study were asked to recall recent instances when their mothers exhibited behaviours such as warmth or competence. Some were prompted to think of positive examples, while others reflected on times their mothers showed a lack of warmth or competence. This process, known as cognitive reappraisal, is commonly used in both daily life and therapy to alter one’s emotional response to a situation or person.
Reflecting on the development of the study, Professor Patihis added: “The other motivation came from being present in Professor Linda Levine’s lab meetings in 2010 and 2011, and wondering if her work on memory of emotion could be extended to memory of emotions towards parents. At that time, I made a mental note that someone should research that, and I finally got the time to do it many years later.”
The study found that engaging in these writing prompts shifted how participants felt about their mothers. Those focusing on positive traits reported feeling more happiness and interest towards their mothers, while those reflecting on negative traits reported fewer positive emotions. This shift was particularly notable in happiness and interest levels.
An intriguing discovery was that these reappraisals not only changed participants’ current emotions towards their mothers but also affected their childhood memories of those emotions. For example, those asked to recall positive behaviours from their mothers remembered more happiness from their childhood compared to those focusing on negative behaviours. Although these memory changes were subtler than shifts in current emotions, they were still significant.
Discussing these implications, Professor Patihis said: “First, we found that simply asking people to write several sentences about recent examples in which their mother had shown a lack of generosity, or a lack of warmth, or gave bad guidance, led to a shift in the current cognitive appraisals of the participants’ mother. In other words, those in this condition came to reappraise their mother in a downward direction. That is big news in and of itself and is a new method of creating changes in appraisals.”
Beyond its focus on mothers, the study suggests that cognitive reappraisals could have broader applications for other relationships. This has potential implications in therapy, particularly when clients are encouraged to reappraise relationships with parents or partners.
“The other huge finding,” Profesor Patihis continued, “is that these reappraisals also appear to distort childhood memories of emotions towards the mother. For example, a participant in the appraisal down condition is likely to underestimate their memories of happiness they felt towards their mother in childhood. Those randomly assigned to other conditions appear to have similar nudges accordingly. The question is, over weeks and weeks of more severe reappraisal in a dubious psychotherapy, would the distortion of memories of emotion from childhood be more severe than what we found in a short experiment? I worry that psychotherapies that reappraise parents and partners may indeed lead to large shifts in memories of emotion.”
These findings highlight the subtle yet powerful ways in which therapy can potentially alter a client’s memories of their past. Even without suggestive questioning, therapists who encourage clients to reflect on parental behaviours may inadvertently reshape their memories of those relationships. This could have both positive and negative outcomes, depending on the direction of the reappraisal.
Researchers also note that the impact of reappraisal extends beyond therapy sessions, as individuals naturally engage in this process when reflecting on their relationships. Whether in casual conversations or therapy, memories and emotions linked to childhood may be subtly shaped by how people are prompted to think about their past.
The study raises practical questions for therapists, who may need to be more cautious when using reappraisal techniques, particularly when discussing parental relationships. It also suggests clients might benefit from being informed about the potential for memory alteration when reappraisal is used as a therapeutic tool.
Looking ahead, Professor Patihis revealed: “We are working on an article examining whether reappraising a first-date romantic partner is also possible in similar research. Watch this space for an equally controversial and groundbreaking research article in the next few months.”
