As it’s Aromatherapy Awareness Week, Pippa Murphy, the sex and relationship expert at condoms.uk has shared seven relationship benefits of giving your partner a sensual massage before sharing her top tips for first-timers.
Pippa Murphy said: “Aromatherapy Awareness Week is the perfect time to explore the benefits of essential oils and how they can enhance your relationship. Giving your partner a sensual massage is a fantastic way to incorporate aromatherapy into your life while fostering intimacy, relaxation, and connection.”
Here are her top reasons to consider giving your partner a sensual massage this Aromatherapy Awareness Week.
It deepens your emotional connection
A sensual massage allows you and your partner to connect more deeply from an emotional perspective. When you give your partner a sensual massage, you must be fully present and attentive to their needs. This level of focus and care can help strengthen the emotional bond between you and your partner, creating a deeper sense of trust and understanding.
It improves communication
A sensual massage encourages open communication as you explore your partner’s body and learn what feels good for them. This can lead to more honest and open conversations about your desires and needs inside and outside the bedroom.
It can enhance physical intimacy – and no, that doesn’t always mean sex
There’s often a misconception that a sensual massage must result in sex, but that doesn’t always have to be the ‘happy ending’ of a massage. Instead, a sensual massage should focus on giving each other pleasure through touch. See it as a chance to explore each other’s bodies, learn what feels good, and create a shared experience that can bring you closer together.
It boosts self-esteem
Giving your partner a sensual massage can make them feel cared for, desired, and appreciated. This can increase self-esteem and confidence, positively impacting your relationship overall.
It reduces stress and enhances your mood
Naturally, stress and tension can take a toll on most relationships; however, a massage can help alleviate stress and promote relaxation, leading to a more harmonious and balanced relationship. This is why I’d also recommend combining essential oils into your massage, as it can create a calming environment and help you and your partner unwind after a long day.
It can be a pain relief
Aromatherapy massage can help alleviate muscle tension and pain. Incorporating essential oils with analgesic and anti-inflammatory properties, such as eucalyptus, peppermint, or rosemary, can help soothe sore muscles and provide relief for your partner.
It promotes overall well-being
Aromatherapy and massage have numerous health benefits, including improved circulation, boosted immune system, and increased mental clarity. Giving your partner a sensual massage promotes relaxation and intimacy and improves their health and well-being.
First time giving a sensual massage? Here’s a step-by-step guide
If you’ve never given a massage before, don’t worry, it’s not as difficult as it might seem. In fact, with the right techniques and some practice, you’ll soon be able to give a great sensual massage every time.
Set up a massage space in this unpredictable spot
The first step is making sure that you pick the right spot. While most people tend to massage their partner in bed, this can sometimes make for an awkward scenario if your bed is super bouncy and there’s little room for you to stand around it.
Instead, I’d consider setting up a massage space in the living room by laying a thick blanket on the floor and then a hot towel. Not only will this alternative environment make it more intimate as it’s ‘new’ but you’ll likely have more space to give them a proper massage.
Next, light some candles around the room before dimming the lights and closing the curtains. This will help create a cosy and comfortable atmosphere.
And finally, you need to pick the right kind of music. You don’t want to put on something too distracting while trying to concentrate on working out kinks in muscles or helping your partner relax; however, you also don’t want silence between you and your partner during this intimate time together. Find something that will provide background noise without distracting from the experience of being together in such an intimate way.
Pick the perfect aromatherapy oil based on your partner’s needs
Now you’ll need aromatherapy oil – around two tablespoons worth. Your pick depends on the message you want to give your partner. For example, coconut and jojoba oil provide a smoothing glide during the massage, reducing the friction between your hands and your partner’s skin.
Aromatherapy oils for a sensual massage
- Ylang-ylang oil – This essential oil is known for its aphrodisiac properties and can help boost libido and enhance the sensual experience.
- Cinnamon oil – Cinnamon oil is known to assist with erectile dysfunction and has a naturally sweet and warm flavour, making it a great addition to the sensual massage oil.
- Lavender oil – Known for its calming properties, it is best used when your partner has had a long and stressful day.
- Jasmine oil – With its sweet, floral scent, jasmine essential oil can help uplift the mood and create a sensual atmosphere.
Get them nakey, nakey, nakey but make sure you have that hot towel on hand
Next, ask your partner if they feel comfortable enough to remove their clothes fully before you have them lie face-down on top of the hot towel. If they don’t feel comfortable being fully naked or want to keep their underwear on, you can help them ease into the situation by placing another towel on their most intimate areas.
Warm up the aromatherapy oil in your hands
As you’ve picked the perfect aromatherapy oil for your partner, you should start by pouring a small amount of massage oil into your hands before rubbing them together to warm the oil up. This will make the oil more comfortable for your partner and help it glide more easily over their skin.
Start with gentle, smooth strokes on this part of the body
A good massage is like foreplay – it should start slowly and build up. I suggest you begin with smooth, rhythmic strokes to help settle them. You can do this by gently applying pressure with your fingertips in a circular motion. Start with their arms, as you’ll find it the easiest as it’s one of the smallest body parts, before moving onto their back, shoulders, neck, head, legs and then their bum.
Gradually apply more pressure as you get into it
As your partner becomes more relaxed, gradually increase the pressure of your strokes. Use your palms, fingers, and forearms to apply pressure and knead their muscles. Be sure to check in with your partner regularly to ensure they are comfortable with the pressure.
Whatever you do, always keep at least one hand on your partner. This will help build physical intimacy, bringing every ounce of their attention to whatever part of their body will touch it.
Find their tense areas and focus on them
Over time, you should begin to find your flow, so you should start to take up a level by paying special attention to areas where your partner may be holding tension, such as the neck, shoulders, and lower back. Use your fingers and thumbs to apply targeted pressure and knead the muscles in these areas.
You may need to incorporate other techniques when you come across tense areas. You can try techniques such as effleurage (long, gliding strokes), petrissage (kneading and squeezing), and friction (rubbing the skin to create heat).
Do, however, make sure to listen out for your partner’s response, breathing or body language, as if the knot is extra tight, it could turn the whole experience from pleasurable to painful. You should, therefore, go slow and react to their reactions.
Take your time with it all
A sensual massage should be a slow and deliberate experience. Take your time and maintain a steady pace, allowing your partner to relax and enjoy the sensations fully.
This is why communication is key, too. Check-in with your partner throughout the massage to ensure they are comfortable and enjoying the experience. Encourage them to provide feedback on the pressure, techniques, and areas they want you to focus on.
To finish it off, end it gently
As you finish the massage, gradually reduce the pressure and return to gentle, soothing strokes. This will help your partner transition from the massage and maintain their relaxed state.
Remember, the key to a successful sensual massage is open communication, attentiveness, and a genuine desire to help your partner relax and feel good. Enjoy the experience and the deepened connection it can bring to your relationship.
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