Home Family & Relationship 10 Reasons Why Modern-Day Marriages Don’t Last Long

10 Reasons Why Modern-Day Marriages Don’t Last Long

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A long and happy marriage requires hard work and mutual respect, but that isn’t always found in relationships. While knowing how to find a good marriage counsellor can save your marriage, understanding why marriages fail can help you prevent these problems before they start.

How relationship education can prevent marital problems 

Proper relationship education can reinforce positive decisions and challenge negative relationship models. We often build our foundation for romantic relationships in childhood, and if these opinions aren’t challenged, it could lead an individual to promote negative behaviours.

Getting a licensed marriage and family therapist or an LMFT degree can be a great way to help couples with their relationships. As a non-biased third party, therapists are able to evaluate the relationship and offer guidance on how to improve it without causing hurt feelings.

While individual education can be beneficial, having a degree in this field can provide a deeper understanding of the complexities of relationships and the tools needed to help couples navigate them successfully.

10 Reasons why modern couples are divorcing 

It can be difficult to recognise behaviours that are leading to divorce, especially when couples aren’t aware that said behaviours are toxic. However, these 10 things often lead to divorce.

1. Poor communication

The lack of proper communication between couples can cause misunderstandings, which may lead to an eventual divorce. Many couples consider all conflicts bad, which isn’t the case. Marriage counselling can help you cope with issues better and reignite the spark in your marriage. For example, an excellent way to work on your relationship and your communication is by going to a Christian couples counseling retreat together. Marriage counselling retreats have helped many couples save their marriages by providing the space and tools to understand each other’s needs and discover how to meet them with love.

2. Financial difficulties

It’s no secret that money can make or break your relationship especially when debt is piling up. Poor financial habits are typically noticed before marriage but are rarely communicated. If your partner is constantly spending recklessly, it could make you resentful, bitter, and angry.

3. Infidelity (cheating)

It doesn’t take an expert to understand how cheating can tear apart any married couple, no matter how long they’ve known each other. Many couples still manage to stay together through infidelity, but the trust is often gone from the relationship. This eventually leads to a divorce.

4. Lack of commitment

It’s not uncommon for couples to take marriage lightly, even though it signifies a renewed commitment towards one’s partner. While a person who isn’t committed may cheat, they may also become distant or less interested in the marriage due to fears of being “tied down”.

5. Unrealistic expectations

When tying the knot, couples tend to idealise aspects of their marriage. However, if these expectations don’t reflect reality, the relationship could crumble under their disappointment. Or these aspects become moments of contention, which may spark many arguments.

6. Pressure from family members 

When you marry your partner, you’re becoming a part of an extended family. If you or your partner don’t get along with the extended family, that could cause a lot of problems. You or your partner may feel pressured to leave the other or to perform mean-spirited actions.

7. Inability to compromise 

If you’re interested in learning how to find a good marriage counsellor, then start by looking for a professional that can teach you how to compromise. Without this skill, one party will always get their way, while the other will be unhappy. That’s not a good recipe for a long-term commitment. 

8. Too much stress 

Everyday pressures and stress can be too much for couples to handle on their own, which may cause them to ignore each other. While it’s normal for couples to deal with daily stressors, they can’t forget about nurturing their relationship. Otherwise, the marriage will become passionless. 

9. Different or contrasting goals 

When two people come from different backgrounds, there’s a possibility that you’ll have different or contrasting goals. For example, one person wants children while the other doesn’t. These differences can completely end a relationship that would have otherwise worked well.

10. Changes in the relationship 

Divorce is more common than ever, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes, couples divorce because they’ve changed and no longer see themselves spending their lives together. This amicable breakup can allow both parties to explore new options and live separate lives.


It’s best to understand the pitfalls of marriage before taking that big step. While not all of them will be present in your relationship, being aware sure helps reduce their prevalence. If you’re aware of the red flags now, you can avoid an unhappy marriage and unnecessary arguments.

Tim Williamson, a psychology graduate from the University of Hertfordshire, has a keen interest in the fields of mental health, wellness, and lifestyle.

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