The perfect marriage is attainable with the right amount of teamwork. Even when things aren’t perfect, you’re still in the driver’s seat to make things right. Before you get to the point of no return, evaluate these ways to bring your marriage back from the brink.
Treat each day like it’s the last
Separation lawyers have to deal with the fallout of what a couple once was. Making each day special is how couples stop the slow descent of losing themselves in a marriage. If you care about your spouse, treat each day like it’s the last.
Boundaries are easy to cross, and the hurt it causes can be hard to mend. When your spouse has a clear boundary, breaking it causes a loss in trust. It is more painful to have lines broken by someone that knows you.
When your spouse shares a secret, it is for your ears only. Breaking that confidence is an ultimate betrayal of trust. When marriages break down, trust is the first thing to go.
Don’t talk down your marriage
When an individual lends an ear to hear about your problems, it does nothing to help your relationship. Seeing a professional about marriage counselling is completely different from gossiping to people you know. The same relationship weaknesses you complain about to individuals will be exploited when you least expected it.
Use compliments to soften the blow
Knowing a person does not mean that they don’t need a buffer. Use tact to avoid arguments during disagreements. Treat your partner with respect, and they will usually return the favour.
Laughter is lifelong medicine
When is the last time you laughed with your spouse? It seems silly, but a good strong laugh can change the temperature in the room. Plenty of heated arguments have ended with both partners laughing at the immaturity of the content.
Be realistic about responsibilities
Sometimes chores are not evenly split between partners. The same can be said about the financial burden. It’s important that each spouse respect’s what the other brings to the relationship, and never resort to belittling the other’s contributions.
Be honest about children
Couples that shy away from discussing children openly will invite a huge problem into their relationship. It takes two to have, love and raise children in a happy household. If one partner is against having children, it creates a hole in the relationship that can never be filled. Discussion about children should take place before a marriage, but that isn’t always the case.
Talk openly about finances
A chance to lose the roof over your head causes an irreparable amount of stress. A partner needs to feel secure in the relationship at all times. Having weekly meetings about finances is responsible, and keeps both partners on track to avoid debt. No matter who the bread winner is, being open about finances makes for a better marriage.
Choose to be in love
Anyone can fall in love, but it takes work to stay in that same headspace. When you make the choice to fight for love, your marriage becomes secure. Stay close to what excites you, and there will always be a special warmth in your heart.
Tommy Williamson did his degree in psychology at the University of Edinburgh. He is interested in mental health and well-being.