A recent study by caba has revealed that over three-quarters (76%) of women regularly rewrite their emails – not to correct mistakes, but to soften their tone. Whether it’s a quick message or a detailed report, many women worry about being perceived as too harsh or assertive.

If you find yourself second-guessing an email draft or re-reading a Slack message before sending it, you might be engaging in what’s now being termed as ‘her-alysis’. This phenomenon highlights the over-analysis many women practice, driven by the fear of being perceived as overly assertive or impolite.

Candice Baker, HR and People expert at caba, explains: ”Women often change their behaviour, such as rewriting emails or adding exclamation marks to soften their tone. However, ‘her-alysis’ goes beyond wanting to be liked – it can reflect lower confidence or a desire to avoid confrontation, suggesting women feel less secure in their professional roles and authority.”

How “her-alysis” habits are affecting women’s careers

Women often rely on exclamation marks, soften language with phrases like “just”, “actually”, or “I think”, or pepper emails with smiles or emojis. Qualifiers such as “I’m no expert but…” and an over-reliance on niceties can make them appear less confident, even when these habits seem harmless.

While such behaviours might seem trivial, they may prevent women from being seen as clear and assertive professionals. These habits often reflect deeper insecurities about authority in the workplace. Caba’s research found that nearly two-thirds of women regularly experience self-doubt at work, which can ultimately hold them back from career progression.

“Although these behaviours might seem insignificant, they can significantly impact professional life and mental health,” Candice warns. “Overthinking can lead to burnout. Repeatedly questioning yourself or fearing rejection can affect mental wellbeing, and downplaying your achievements may cause you to miss out on opportunities for recognition or leadership roles.”

Steps to overcome “her-alysis”

Avoiding “her-alysis” requires a strong sense of self-confidence. Candice Baker offers several strategies to help women break these habits:

• Use confident language. Start small. Send an email without over-editing. Practise being clear and direct, avoiding unnecessary exclamation points or apologetic tones. Subtle changes in language can boost your confidence and authority over time.
• Set boundaries. Burnout is real. Overloading yourself isn’t a strength, and setting clear boundaries will help you manage stress and perform at your best.
• Celebrate achievements. Acknowledging your wins, no matter how small, can provide a critical confidence boost. When self-doubt creeps in, remind yourself of how far you’ve come.
• Build a support network. A strong network can provide encouragement and a safe space to discuss challenges. Sharing concerns often lightens the burden and offers new perspectives.
• Give constructive feedback. Addressing unfair treatment or downplayed success is crucial. By offering constructive feedback, you can foster positive changes in how others interact with you.

Building confidence at work is an ongoing process that requires self-awareness, persistence, and a willingness to step out of your comfort zone.

For those seeking to improve their confidence, caba offers a range of proactive support resources and development courses aimed at empowering women in the workplace.