Break-ups and heartbreak are, unfortunately, intrinsic parts of finding love. You cannot have one without the other. And while it can be incredibly painful to languish in the heartbreak after a treasured relationship has ended, it’s an important part of the grieving process which will leave you stronger when and if you embark on another relationship in the future.
The importance of grieving after a breakup
It’s important to unpack the emotions that we’re feeling and reflect and recharge before falling into the arms of another. Be patient with yourself; grief rarely plays by the rules and can often hang around for far longer than you were expecting. It is also rarely proportional to the amount of time you were with a person. Other factors, like where you are in your life, can also impact the length of the grieving process.
Whichever side of the breakup you were on, your grief and loss are worthy and take time to overcome.
How to regain your confidence
If you’re over the phase of binging Netflix series in your pyjamas and playing Taylor Swift songs on repeat, it might be time to start engaging with the world again. That doesn’t mean slamming your laptop shut, necking back some wine and hitting the dancefloor. It’s all about baby steps, so take some time to pamper yourself and feel like you again.
One way to feel better about yourself is to wear clothes that make you feel awesome. Maybe it’s a sparkly dress, perhaps it’s a showstopping pair of heels or maybe it’s even a spangly pair of earrings that make your ears ache. Women´s skirts retailer Damart surveyed 2,000 UK adults to find out that people are more attracted to clothes that give them self-confidence (16%) and pieces that make them feel comfortable in their own skin (14%).
You don’t need to break the bank either. Just 4% of UK adults admitted to designer clothing making them feel more stylish whilst only 2% consider wearing tends to be an important part of feeling confident.
Is there a more empowering feeling than doing something that you’ve been avoiding for ages? There might have been a few things you’ve wanted to do but your last relationship got in the way. It could be something small like getting your hair dyed or something major like learning a new language.
Focusing on new projects will build back your self-esteem and independence, whilst also arming you with new confidence and skills for the future.
Zuella Montemayor did her degree in psychology at the University of Toronto. She is interested in mental health, wellness, and lifestyle.