Despite some lingering stigma, having sex on the first date is by no means uncommon in today’s culture of dating apps and sex positivity. But just how many of us are throwing out the third date rule to have sex straight away? And why might some of us still prefer to wait?
Sexual wellness brand Love Honey has surveyed over 2,000 adults to investigate how many of us have had sex on the first date, and why we are – or aren’t – open to it.
49% of singletons have admitted to having sex on the first date
Nearly half (49%) of respondents to Lovehoney’s survey said that they have had sex on date number one. Men are particularly prone to a first-date hookup, with just under 60% of male respondents admitting to having done this.
Women, on the other hand, are slightly less inclined to jump into bed right away, with only 43% having had sex on the first date and 46% saying they never have. Given that women have generally received more judgment throughout history for being sexually active, it’s not surprising that they may want to wait longer before having sex.
Have you ever had sex on a first date? | % of people that have | % of men that have | % of women that have |
Yes | 49% | 59% | 43% |
Over 70% of men are open to sex on the first date, but the majority of women (61%) are not
When asked whether they were open to having sex on the first date (even if they previously haven’t), over 70% of men said yes but the majority of women (61%) said no.
Men’s most common reason (and the most common reason overall) for being open to sex on the first date is simply because they enjoy it, but the majority of female respondents who were open to it said that this is because it enables them to see if they’re sexually compatible straight away. 49% of women selected this as their primary reason for being okay with sex on the first date, compared to 44% of men.
47% of people aren’t comfortable having sex with someone they don’t know well
Among those who said they’ve never had sex on a first date, the most common reason (47%) was that they don’t feel comfortable having sex with someone they don’t know very well. This was followed by ‘I don’t believe in having sex on the first date’ (38%), and ‘I only enjoy sex with people I have an emotional connection with’ (32%).
Reason for not having sex on the first date | % of people that have said this is the main reason for them not having sex on the first date |
I don’t feel comfortable having sex with someone I didn’t know very well | 47% |
I don’t believe in having sex on the first date | 38% |
I only enjoy sex with people I have an emotional connection with | 32% |
I have a rule about not sleeping with someone on the first date | 25% |
I’m conscious of STIs and pregnancy | 17% |
A lack of emotional connection was the second most popular reason among men, suggesting that men are more likely than women to want emotional closeness before things get physical.
You can view the full study https://www.lovehoney.com/