We all find ourselves, at one point or another, faced with making “big” decisions, like getting married (or not), starting a new job (or not), or whether to pursue further education (or go straight into work). Naturally, it is important to consider your options when faced with a decision of this nature and choose carefully which you think is best suited to you – but how do you do this without over-stressing? 

The burden of choice?

There has never been such a broad range of jobs available, people to meet, or new things to experience. As such, people (especially young people) often find themselves paralysed by choice: if anything is possible, how do I decide on just one thing? And even having decided, how do I go about making that happen for me? For example, if you’d like to go into healthcare as a career, it can be hard to work out how to become a nurse; if you’ve decided you’d like to settle down and start a family, how do you know you’ve found the right person? Should you buy or rent? Choices can be a burden.

Dealing with decision fatigue

It is easy to see how quickly decisions can build up – but this is not something to fear. Rather, you must be wary of decision fatigue: this is the state that we are all familiar with when we are simply too mentally drained or overwhelmed to make good decisions. The thing to do in this situation is not simply to struggle through but to re-ground yourself. The World Health Organisation recommends just taking two minutes to focus on the world around you: note the sights, smells, sounds, and substance of your immediate vicinity. Meditation can be a powerful tool, too, as it should help clear your head while at the same time physically lowering your heart rate and regulating your breathing.

Decision-making techniques

 There is no right or wrong way to make a decision – at the end of the day, you must do whatever feels right to you. However,  here are some methods that might help you reformat the decision you are making into a manageable task rather than a daunting worry.

• List the pros and cons. This is a classic piece of decision-making advice: make a list of the positives and the negatives that, for example, moving house would bring. Perhaps it might have a bigger garden; on the other hand, it might be half an hour further from your place of work, cutting out precious family time. The key here is not just to make the list but to pay attention to how you feel when writing it: the emotions you feel when writing may give you a good indication of your true feelings about the decision.
• Deadlines. Deadlines can be an effective way of focusing your mind on making a decision rather than continuing to worry about it in an abstract way for longer than you need to. While it is worth remembering that deadlines can be flexible and can be adjusted if they’re causing too much stress, if you select a workable time frame, a deadline can save you prolonged stress and help avoid decision fatigue.
• Decision trees. This was a management technique initially but is just as applicable to individual decision-making. Try writing down some of the probable paths that your decision might bring about; ask yourself whether these are desirable or manageable. As part of this, try and identify a (reasonable) worst- and best-case scenario in each case. How much would you like the best outcome? How would you cope with the worst?

Stay decision-fit

While these tactics can be useful, it is just as important to take good care of yourself in the long term, especially if you are in a period where you may have to make several important decisions. Again, self-care looks different to everybody, but the essentials are universal. Eat a balanced diet, and drink enough water. Ensure that you get enough sleep – ignore, if at all possible, the temptation to stay up stressing, as it is often more productive to get a good night’s sleep and approach the decision fresh the next morning. Crucially, try to get regular exercise, despite being distracted: as little as thirty minutes of daily exercise is hugely beneficial to your mental health, as it releases serotonin and endorphins while helping to regulate stress hormones.

Don’t suffer in silence

As well as taking care of yourself physically, remember not to neglect your emotional side. It can be easy to feel isolated or to put emotional maintenance on a back-burner when trying to make big decisions, but it is important to stay connected to those you care about and to seek help if you find your mental health is being affected.

Speak to your friends about decisions you may be struggling with. Even if they can’t help you decide, sometimes talking something out loud helps make things clearer internally as well – a problem shared really can be a problem halved. Remember, too, that there are professional services that can assist if you think that you may be being affected by anxiety, or other mental health issues, in the course of making your big decisions.

Samantha Green, a psychology graduate from the University of Hertfordshire, has a keen interest in the fields of mental health, wellness, and lifestyle.