Men who hate women, and women who hate men have handicapped themselves in a number of ways. Their hatred of the opposite sex permeates their perceptions of life and creates much inner and outer strife for themselves and those they oppose. Relationships between these types of men and women have little chance to be successful or mutually beneficial.
The ‘battle of the sexes’ has waged on since time immemorial and our inabilities to understand one another has always been at the forefront of this life experience. Misunderstanding and confusion between the sexes will always be present as our ways of thinking and feeling are inherently different and sometimes opposing by our nature. There are many good reasons for this and it is an ongoing and normal aspect of life. Hatred, on the other hand, is extreme, destructive, and needs to be overcome.
Hatred of opposites speaks volumes about one’s level of consciousness. If analysed in an objective manner, hatred in any form robs the hater of any chance of having peace of mind. It is never constructive and always produces negative results for both the hater and the hated. As a society we need to try and eliminate hate at its source. Similar to getting rid of a weed in a garden, we must be sure we get to the root of the matter.
Misogyny and misandry is typically an unconscious hatred that people might form early in life, often initiated or exposed with failed relationships. Hurt feelings from these relationships can linger, fester, and grow into a negative, irrational generalisation that will include almost everyone of the opposite sex. Rational decision making with relationships will be thrown out the door when the emotions of hatred are in control.
Misogynists and misandrists (unconsciously) get off on treating their opposites badly. Every time they can put down or hurt the feelings of someone of the opposite sex, they unconsciously feel good. This is because deep down in their lower brain, their bad behaviour is rewarded with a dose of the pleasure chemical dopamine, which makes them want to repeat the behaviour again and again.
This behaviour is very indicative of being totally ego driven, The ego always feels better when they can put others down; that’s just the way the ego works. The ego believes that it is the centre of the universe and that everything revolves around them. If it feels invalidated or violated it has a tendency to want to get revenge upon those they feel are responsible.
Misogynists and misandrists are really nothing more than simple revenge seekers trying to overcome a deep seated hurt within themselves. The target of their revenge is the opposite sex.An egocentric point of view has been chosen and all other perspectives have been shut down. This is the common denominator that is present in any form of racism, discrimination, or oppression of others. The ego is always at the core of our inhumanity towards others. It is always at the core of our conflicts and breakdowns in our relationships.
Our fractured culture is badly in need of healing, from the gender wars as well as other divisions that stem from our egocentric points of view. To be a part of this healing, we must first recognise how our egos negatively impact our own lives and then try to suppress its control. Only then can we begin to help others to do the same. Some feel that we are at a crossroad in our evolution of humanity. Either we overcome the ego’s control now or else we will have to endure it’s destructive consequences and overcome it later.
Scott Trettenero’s recent book, Master the Mystery of Human Nature: Resolving the Conflict of Opposing Values helps readers learn about themselves, others and how the world works because of our differences. Scott has maintained a solo dental practice in Southwest Florida since 1981. His research on quality service in dentistry and his interest in human temperaments formed the basis for his first book, Unlocking the T-Code. He is married and has two children. You can follow him on Twitter @